Almost certainly not Johnny Depp.

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Below are the 50 most recent journal entries recorded in The Weasel King's LiveJournal:

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    Sunday, September 25th, 2016
    11:54 pm
    Originally posted by hindustar at post
    Thursday, September 22nd, 2016
    2:12 pm
    Thursday, September 15th, 2016
    11:43 am
    A slice of life.
    torrain, returning from LCBO: "Look what I got!"

     photo wine_zps0lbgnw6p.jpg

    Me: "It's pink and has skulls. OF COURSE you bought it. It's your brand!"

    torrain: "I do not have a brand. And if I had a brand it would have mushroom clouds."

    Me: "If that had a mushroom cloud, you would have bought ALL of them."

    torrain: "I would not! I would have bought three."

    Me: "And how many of them were there?"

    torrain: "....three."
    Tuesday, September 13th, 2016
    11:58 am
    Watching e.coli develop antibiotic resistance, on video.

    It took 11 days for a population of e.coli to mutate and develop complete resistance to the antibiotic.
    Monday, September 12th, 2016
    2:57 pm
    Not The Onion.
    Black metal legend Fenriz, lead singer of Darkthrone, elected to Oslo city council against his will.

    "My campaign was a picture of me holding my cat saying, ‘Please don’t vote for me.’ But people just went nuts."
    Thursday, September 8th, 2016
    3:25 pm
    An interesting tactic, to say the least.
     photo pence_zpsxobcmj6s.png

    So here we have Mike Pence making an unusual choice - clearly endorsing someone other than Trump. And why mention only three candidates? If you're going to admit that wannabes, no-hopers, and also-rans exist, why not mention all of them? Or at least make it clear which one you're endorsing?

    He mentions his running mate (that's Trump), he mentions a "bold truth-teller" (from anyone else that would mean Clinton, but that seems an unlikely choice for Pence's endorsement), and he mentions the most dishonest candidate in history (presumably he means Clinton and is just repeating the standard lie).

    So who's the "Bold Truth-Teller" he wants everyone to vote for, who he's supporting *over* his own running mate?
    Wednesday, September 7th, 2016
    10:46 pm
    I love this game's idea of "subtle"
    Lorenzo de Medici: "I need some corrupt guards killed and I need it to look like an accident."

    Me, walks up to guard in crowded market and grabs him in a headlock, dragging him towards a well: "HELLO do you have a moment to talk about our Lord and Saviour HAHAHA SNEAK ATTACK TOSSED YOU DOWN A WELL!"

    Guard: [faint muffled splash, glub, blippy interface noise of combat ending because all enemies are now underwater and sinking]

    Me, doing a victory dance on the lip of the well, in his best Ducky voice: "Guard go down the hooooooole"

    Crowd of 40+ civilians: [shocked stares]

    Me, drawing a sword, shouting: "He was drunk and fell in on his own. I was never here."

    Crowd of 40+ civilians: "He was drunk and fell on his his own. What assassin? We will probably never notice the dead body in our water supply."

    Me, running off, shoving people and tearing up "wanted" posters with my face on them: "Yay!"

    Lorenzo de Medici: "Excellent work, here's a bonus for keeping it quiet."

    (Assassin's Creed 2)
    2:03 pm
    12:08 am
    Hey, remember when John Kasich's brand was "I'm the sane Republican"? I don't blame you if you forgot, "sane" never polls more than 2% among American Republicans, so you could totally be forgiven for forgetting John "sanity is a rounding error among my target audience" Kasich.

    Anyway. Kasich has decided that sanity is off-brand, and as "the only sane Republican" in September 2016, he's decided his best course of action is to attack Daniel Radcliffe. Yes, the English actor who played Harry Potter. Because Radcliffe has said "I am an adult who tries to understand the world and deal with it like an adult" and Kasich apparently considers attacking that something that will win him votes in the USA.

    Kasich isn't WRONG, by the way. He's deeply stupid, but not wrong.
    Tuesday, September 6th, 2016
    4:54 pm
    Friday, September 2nd, 2016
    2:40 pm
    Thursday, September 1st, 2016
    3:24 pm
    Out of context Oglaf Panel!
     photo dealsoff_zpsptnozxj1.png

    (Beware, link is often but not always NSFW.)
    10:26 am
    Wednesday, August 31st, 2016
    11:17 am
    10:05 am
    A quick request
    I don't have a paid LJ account any more. Can someone do me a solid and create an RSS feed here for Lake Gary?

    EDIT: lakegarycomic, thank you ashbet.
    Tuesday, August 30th, 2016
    3:46 pm
    I love living in the future.
    Keystroke detection from wi-fi distortion: The premise that your finger position distorts wi-fi signals in predictable ways, allowing an attacker to determine what letters you're typing on your laptop keyboard by listening to your wireless signal.

    Related: Identifying individuals by body as they distort wi-fi by passing through a signal
    1:04 pm
    Monday, August 29th, 2016
    4:55 pm
    12:06 pm
    Friday, August 26th, 2016
    4:29 pm
    This makes SO MUCH SENSE.
    MORPHEUS: For the longest time, I wouldn't believe it. But then I saw the fields with my own eyes, watched them liquefy the dead so they could be fed intravenously to the living -

    NEO (politely): Excuse me, please.

    MORPHEUS: Yes, Neo?

    NEO: I've kept quiet for as long as I could, but I feel a certain need to speak up at this point. The human body is the most inefficient source of energy you could possibly imagine. The efficiency of a power plant at converting thermal energy into electricity decreases as you run the turbines at lower temperatures. If you had any sort of food humans could eat, it would be more efficient to burn it in a furnace than feed it to humans. And now you're telling me that their food is the bodies of the dead, fed to the living? Haven't you ever heard of the laws of thermodynamics?

    MORPHEUS: Where did you hear about the laws of thermodynamics, Neo?

    NEO: Anyone who's made it past one science class in high school ought to know about the laws of thermodynamics!

    MORPHEUS: Where did you go to high school, Neo?


    NEO: the Matrix.

    MORPHEUS: The machines tell elegant lies.


    NEO (in a small voice): Could I please have a real physics textbook?

    MORPHEUS: There is no such thing, Neo. The universe doesn't run on math.

    - from here, right at the bottom.
    Wednesday, August 24th, 2016
    12:28 pm
    10:54 am
    Homeless woman hauling suitcases full of paperwork around Washington for years claims the government owes her $100,000 - and she's right.

    (And, of course, it wouldn't be a story written by a man about a woman if it didn't remark, over and over, on how little she smiles.)
    Tuesday, August 23rd, 2016
    5:27 pm
    A terrifying thought.
    Donald Trump is *not* the most racist, least coherent, and stupidest Republican running for office in the USA this year.

    Aulani Kaaihue is the Republican candidate for Hawaii's 2nd Congressional District, and she is.... confused, at best. In all-caps. Very Christian. And boy howdy does she hate herself some Japanese people.

    Bonus, if you scroll down you'll see that about 1/4 of her posts are about her boyfriend Howard Kim, who is running as a Democrat in Hawaii's 1st District on a platform of, I shit you not "Elect me because I do not have cancer". Because the previous holder of the seat, Mark Takai, died of cancer last month.

    Notably, Mr Kim was *not* chosen by the Democratic Party as their candidate in the election - he lost to Colleen Hanabusa and will not be appearing on the ballot at all[1]. Ms Kaaihue *was* chosen by the Republican Party as the person they most wanted to represent them.

    Also notably: The entire turnout for the Republican primary in her district was approximately 16% of the turnout for the Democratic candidate alone.

    Ms Kaaihue has been denounced by the Republican Party Of Hawaii, who apparently now deeply regret choosing her as their spokesperson and representative.

    [1]: although that hasn't stopped his, uh, "campaign" to win the byelection to finish out the last of Mark Takai's term. Again, I want to point out, on a campaign of "Vote For Me, I Do Not Have Cancer Like That Last Guy Did"
    10:14 am
    This is the neatest little programming game I've seen in years.

    (If you figure out 2-3, tell me? I get close but I'm always missing a function I need) got it
    Sunday, August 21st, 2016
    4:04 pm
    12:21 am
    Saturday, August 20th, 2016
    11:05 pm
    10:33 pm
    Hot take.
    The Tragically Hip are a garbage band that is only famous because of CanCon laws. When Gordon Downey's brain cancer was revealed, the tragedy was "The Tragically Hip will continue to perform", not "their singer is dying". In a just universe ruled by a loving god, the opposite would be true: Gordon Downey would live a happy life in obscurity with nobody ever hearing him "sing", and The Tragically Hip would never have performed any shows, ever.
    Friday, August 19th, 2016
    10:31 am
    They get a special award.
    City of Baltimore hires literal neo-Nazi to defend BPD against lawsuits.

    (They fired him yesterday, six months into his contract, because the fact that the dude is LITERALLY a neo-Nazi finally made headlines big enough for the city to notice.)
    10:28 am
    Wednesday, August 17th, 2016
    4:33 pm
    My day
    > vol destroy vol0
    Are you sure you want to destroy volume 'vol0'? y
    Volume 'vol0' destroyed."

    (I had a very good reason for doing that. )
    Tuesday, August 16th, 2016
    1:59 pm
    Friday, August 12th, 2016
    11:17 am
    Wednesday, August 10th, 2016
    4:27 pm
    11:49 am
    A brief Windows 10 PSA.
    If you've gotten the "anniversary update" of Windows 10, you have probably already noticed that it wasn't just an "update", it was a clean install of a new copy of the OS and then an import of your settings and profile. Which means annoying things like the default MS apps (Edge, Explorer, Store) are re-pinned to start menu, the crappy MS programs for music and things have reset their defaults, your privacy settings have been eBayed unless you were careful during the update, etc.

    All that's fine. It's annoying, but not actively harmful.

    Actively harmful: The option to "notify me when a restart is required to install updates" has been REMOVED. Now there's no setting in the Windows Update options to avoid automatic reboots when it "thinks" you aren't using your computer, and you can only specify a 12 hour window of "never reboot during this time"

    The good news is, there's a solution to that, hiding in Local Group Policy (Win10 Pro) or the Registry (Win10 Home).

    If you've got Win10 Pro:
    1) click start, type "gpedit.msc", press enter. Make the window fullscreen, you will need the room.
    2) On the left, navigate to Computer Configuration -> Administrative Templates -> Windows Components -> Windows Update.
    3) On the right, locate "No auto-restart with logged-on users for scheduled automatic updates installations" and double-click it.
    4) Change the radio button from "not configured" to "enabled". Click OK.
    5) Close the Local Group Policy Editor window.

    Now, the machine will no longer reboot as long as a user is logged in. If all the users are logged out, it'll still reboot automatically but that's generally much less of a problem.

    (OPTIONAL: in that same location from Step 2, choose "Configure Automatic Updates", click Enabled, choose option 3. This reverts to the Win7 default behaviour of "notify me before installing updates", which is good for updates that require a reboot to install and BAD for updates that don't require a reboot. If you set this option, you need to watch for update notifications and deal with them in a timely manner. You can't afford to ignore them.)

    If you've got Win10 Home: Fucked if I know, it's in the registry somewhere. I'm 100% sure it's there, and I'm also 100% sure I don't know where it is. I'll go digging to see if I can find the setting, later, and I'll update this post if I do.

    EDIT: It *looks like* the right solution for Win10 home is: Start -> "regedit" -> Enter. Navigate to HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\WindowsUpdate

    If there's an "AU" subkey, click on it. If there isn't, right-click on "WindowsUpdate", choose "new->key" and name it AU. Inside AU, right-click and choose "New->DWORD Value", name it "AUOptions" and set its value to "3". Close regedit and reboot. This is the same as that step marked OPTIONAL up above for Pro users - if there's a registry equivalent to "No auto-restart with logged-on users" I haven't found it, but this should also get around the problem.
    Tuesday, August 9th, 2016
    10:56 am
    Saturday, August 6th, 2016
    9:48 pm
    A slice of life with TV:
    (In a serious scene about the lifethreatening side effects of misusing a brain stimulator)
    TV character #1: "I must also point out, that device is not intended to be used in that manner."
    TV character #2: "That's what she said."
    Me: "OMG."
    torrain: [spews her drink]

    (Dark Matter)
    Tuesday, August 2nd, 2016
    11:12 am
    Reptile with a camera.
     photo Co05QXLWIAAupRU_zpsxstytyg9.jpg

    Or, if you prefer, "a monitor lizard"
    Monday, August 1st, 2016
    8:24 pm
    John watches movies!
    So I got two sets of free tickets to see movies recently, and so I saw Star Trek: Beyond and Ghostbusters, in the theatre, for free.

    And I have opinions!

    Beyond: Holy shit! I wasn't going to go see this movie, even free. I only wound up attending because 1) free and 2) someone else wanted to go who couldn't use my free tickets unless I went too. And: I did not immediately want to demand my money back. (no really, for a Star Trek movie that's HUGE). As it turns out: removing JJ Abrams and installing Justin Lin and Simon Pegg is not only a many-thousand-times improvement[1] across the board, but results in a movie that's ACTUALLY WORTH SEEING.

    But yeah. ST: Beyond is the fourth Star Trek movie *ever* worth seeing a second time[2]. It avoids 99% of the Abrams innumeracy (a clear sign that Abrams was prohibited from touching the script), has actual character elements, has a reasonable conflict between the heroes and the villains, and is a perfectly Justin Lin movie: Lots of moderately-sensible action sequences, lots of FUN action sequences, moments of character interspersed in the action sequences, and builds to a decent finale. My main complaints are THAT IS NOT A FUCKING NEBULA and there wasn't quite enough clarity on the nature of the enemy. Still, given that it's a sequel to a movie where a CRITICAL PLOT POINT is that HUMANS ON EARTH CANNOT SEE THE MOON, those are miniscule.

    Ghostbusters: Uh. I think this needed one more script pass. I hate dumping on it because of the hypermisogynist babymen screaming about it, but: I thought it was good, but needed work. First: There's a whole lot of "jokes" that aren't jokes, they're just the punchlines to jokes from the original movie. As in, multiple times where there was a funny sequence in the original? Instead of duplicating or or riffing off it, this movie just gives the punchline without the setup. That's a REFERENCE, not a joke, people, and references aren't inherently funny. Second, the film appeared to have no coherent idea of how ghosts work. Okay, the proton packs control ghosts and let you move them around, good. Then they discover they need a trap, okay, good. Now it's time for the big problem, aaaaaaaaand... now proton packs and all the rest *kill* ghosts outright instead of holding them. Why? Nobody knows. The dude causing all the problems has Phenomenal Cosmic Powers to control the bodies and minds of anyone in line of sight.... and then he doesn't. No explanation, nothing. All the ghosts are people until suddenly they're... the ghosts of a Macy's Parade that wasn't murdered all at once because whatever. All the ghosts are ghosts of normal people who died except for the three-story-tall ghost of a giant man?

    And, I mean, they built up Kevin's eye/ear confusion MULTIPLE TIMES. He rubs his eyes when he can't hear you. There's a loud gong and he grabs his eyes going "OMG that's LOUD!". And then he shows the team his audition photos, saying "what makes me look more like a doctor? Shirtless Chris Hemsworth PLAYING the saxophone or Shirtless Chris Hemsworth LISTENING TO the Saxophone".... and he's holding the sax to his ear, not his eyes. That's *the payoff* to the joke you've been building for three scenes, and you flubbed it?

    And let's not forget that at the climax of the film, the ultimate fix to the entire ghost problem happens BECAUSE THE GHOSTS DROVE ECTO-1 TO THE PLOT POINT AT THE RIGHT TIME. They didn't think of that! They didn't work for that! That was a win because of a pure accident! That's just bad writing.

    The pacing was weird, there were a bunch of references where there should have been jokes, there were a number of missed opportunities for jokes that had clearly been set up and then abandoned, and the solution to the main problem was presented WAY too much as pure coincidence, not something the characters did or earned. Dammit, these are competent Esoteric Scientists(tm), they should not be reliant on stupid luck causing THE VILLAINS to bring the solution to the problem to them. This was a chance for them to do things, to come up with a solution and work to bring it about! Having the villains just solve the problem for them felt cheap.

    Anyway. I want to see the director's cut of this movie, where the credits "villain makes cops and military dance" sequence is restored , and the Ghostbusters find a solution to protect themselves from it. I'm interested in the director's cut where they do something to ATTRACT the ghosts and retrieve ECTO-1 at the critical moment. I'm interested in the sequel, where they presumably won't make all these mistakes a second time. But for the movie itself, I have to say "I got in for free and I got my money's worth, no more."

    Also, the product placement was obvious and gross: Stopping mid-scene, staring at the camera, and extolling the virtues of Pringles? People living in downtown New York ordering *PAPA JOHN'S*? Ugh. People, you do not need their money that much.

    [1]: Argument that "JJ Abrams is a zero" and thus multiplying him also results in a zero are accepted and then discarded, because Abrams doesn't just make awful movies. Abrams takes films that COULD be good, and ruins them. He is not a zero, he is a 0.001. You can, with enough effort, fix Abramsisms and make an Abrams film "less awful than most Abrams products" (Spielberg and Super 8) or "reasonably good as long as you ignore Abrams' desperate attempts to ruin it" (Lawrence Kasdan, Disney, and Star Wars: The Force Awakens)

    [2]: Wrath Of Khan, Undiscovered Country, and Galaxy Quest[3].

    [3]: Galaxy Quest not only IS TOO a Star Trek movie, it is the best Star Trek movie ever AND the best Star Trek movie POSSIBLE.
    Friday, July 29th, 2016
    5:22 pm
    3:50 pm
    Reasons John is not allowed in the kitchen unsupervised, Cuban edition.
     photo h28DAF5AF_zpsaurkqmlv.jpg

    I ran across a recipe for slow-cooker Chicken Ropa Vieja, which is basically a slow-cooked shredded-chicken stew and it's both easy and very good. I've made it twice now.

    Recipe, with notes, reproduced to avoid linkrot, behind the cut

    Slow Cooker Chicken Ropa ViejaCollapse )
    9:42 am
    A brief PSA
    Today is the last day to get Windows 10 for free.

    If you don't want Windows 10, those annoying "hey you can upgrade now!" popups will finally vanish. If you do want Windows 10 (and I prefer it to 7 and consider it a complete no-brainer to upgrade from 8) you have another 15 hours or so.
    Monday, July 25th, 2016
    1:34 pm
    10 years ago today, I started my own business.

    That client is no longer in business, and it would still be another month and a half before I would pick up a second client (still going!) and quit my OTHER job at My Beloved Corporate Masters to do this full time, but 10 years ago today was day 1 with client 1.

    Not too shabby.
    Wednesday, July 20th, 2016
    10:31 pm
    Slice of life with Preacher.
    torrain: "Look, when CASSIDY is making better life choices than you are, you're fucked.
    4:15 pm
    For the second year in a row, neo-Nazis have abused a loophole to put garbage onto the Hugo ballot, displacing nominees that were actually voted for by people who genuinely thought they were good. This year, though, instead of JUST a stream of bigoted effluvia, they've also included a handful of nominees that were good and had buzz as maybe getting onto the ballot legitimately on their own.

    So I'm doing something slightly different than my rules for last year - instead of No Awarding all the neo-Nazi picks, I'm comparing them to the worst of my own picks. If something dropped onto the ballot by the white supremacist vandals is good enough that I would have considered nominating it myself had I seen it during the nomination period, it goes above No Award.

    Same as last year, I'm doing breakdowns with my thoughts.
    this is pretty longCollapse )

    EDIT: Oh yeah, there"s the retro-Hugos too.Collapse )

    If you've made it all the way to here, have The Hugo Post Kitty.

    Saturday, July 16th, 2016
    9:21 pm
    Just saw someone complaining that Hillary Clinton is "too liberal". And that drives me crazy because, uh, Americans? Hillary Clinton is *not liberal, in any way, at all*. Hillary Clinton is a hard-right extremist, of the sort that would be considered either "the far right of the rightmost Major Party" or "unelectably far right, relegated to an insignificant joke party" EVERYWHERE IN THE CIVILISED WORLD. Fucking hell, Bernie Sanders is center-right when you look at actual positions and not just "where you are relative to the bigoted extremists".

    Clinton could MAYBE get elected in Canada or England, but she's significantly to the right of Theresa May or Stephen Harper or Boris Johnson - she might be an MP, elected by a yokel constituency of a few thousand xenophobic hicks in the middle of nowhere, like Nigel Farage or Jason Kenney, but she'd never be Prime Minister.

    The USA is a captured two-party system with a hard-right extreme-conservative corporatist party - the Democrats - and also a second ultra-bigoted theocratic party, of the sort that polls 1-2% in civilised places, the Republicans. There's no such thing as an American politician who's "too liberal" because there's no such thing as a liberal American politician, all liberals are excluded before the process starts. Anyone who says an American politician is "too liberal" just means "insufficiently extremist right-wing for my personal ultra-extremist bigotry"

    At the same time, the person ignorantly calling Clinton "too liberal" was doing so in the context of "She's too liberal but Trump is a disaster, so I will vote for the liberal evil" and, uh, okay. Sure. Whatever. Clinton's a right-wing extremist who will be significantly worse than any liberal candidate would be, but you're correct, Trump would be WAY worse. So you do you and hold your nose and vote Clinton, even though she's "too liberal" by being an ultra-right-wing lunatic who is not liberal in any way.
    Thursday, July 14th, 2016
    12:18 pm
    Guess the State!
    Election officials move polling place out of community centre and mosque after death and bomb threats from Trump supporters.

    Poll #2049705 Guess The State!

    Guess The State!

    Friday, July 8th, 2016
    9:25 pm
    Whee, it is the drinking time nao.
    Bob help me, I'm starting to rank the fucking Hugo noms.
    Thursday, July 7th, 2016
    12:30 pm
    Monday, June 27th, 2016
    6:49 pm
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